I hope-y for an sunny walk,
All inna mumf of grimpy Splosh!
I walk in wiv a slate-grey ksky,
And hoping not get awfy wash.
(Der – stewp id! Wotchoo
ix pecked ink, hmmm?)
Me warkled long an look for sea,
De-zerted sandy covey cove,
When Bliy me! Sudden hear a bang!
A funderstorn mine ears behove
(See? You am a ficko;
we said it all along.)
The sksy above all dripsy-drips,
Did starty fall ing on I’s face,
But only pitter-patter splat,
And not yet ever single place.
(Yet! Juss chew wait,
ner-face)
The rain eet rainy splash all wet,
The rainy! Splash! And DOWNPOUR! SOAK!
Ve funderstaum all boing! And bam!
I soaky! Drippy! DRENCHY! Bloke!
(‘Arf, ‘arf, har, har, har!
There wentings our sidesplits,
you massiff irriot; we
tolt chew.)
But not to be defeated I,
I fort, “How bad can soaky get?”
It turns out: Very much, a lot,
Complete and total total-wet.
(We am still orl larff-
out-louding, you ornamental buffoon)
The sudden sodden soaking soak,
Just like I fell in swimming pool,
I’s cloves and shoes ‘n’ ever fink,
Got through-and-frew wiv rainy drool
(Euurrgghh; vat sounds yuk!
You am are an yukkies, intchoo?)
And nearly drowned all drowndy glugle,
Drowny Fergus Gonny-gurgle,
All wet disrobed then dry as dry,
Me put on clothes belong to I.
(Har, har, har! Hey – you
fgot a say – “And ven ve
rain stopt.” Pfffsst!)
And then, of course, the rainy stopt,
It didn’t carry on for much,
It troof I fort it rhathver fun,
I never mind the rain, as such.
(All’s wet that ends wet!
Der, ficko! Ven why quote
Twewff Night, er?!)
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