Turret

Today’s random, mainly senseless and spontaneous remarks, which Mr Turret shouted at the strangers, were:

Is there a marine biologist in the house? The dolphins have all signed a suicide pact!

Somebody help; he’s choking on a bit of fire-engine!

Words, not eyes, are the windows of the soul (450 words). Discuss. I want it on my desk by Monday morning!

Why don’t you just look in the mirror and smile for a change?!

You’re a Japanese car, Mildred!

Jesus died for your hairstyle!

I love you more than an unplugged kettle never boils!

Don’t play it again, Sam; it was excessively tedious the first time.

Leave the debris behind you, Grapefruit, and start all over again!

What if you were wrong and oranges are the only fruit, Jeanette?!

Buy an umbrella, for tomorrow it may rain on the just and the unjust!

But the strangers, who were all the same person, a sufferer of Completely Lunatic Dressing Up Disorder but in a variety of disguises, forgave him for saying too much because.