Wednesday, 1 February 2012

Atheist Tax Scam Nemesis

Atheist tax scam avoids walking through marshmallow hedgerows in order to avoid meeting his arch nemesis; his arch nemesis is a small fieldful of sheep “somewhere in Wales”. Instead, atheist tax scam dons a disguise (just in case) and walks unnoticed down Oxford St., where he looks for silver linings in clouds made of disused school desks from the 1950s “when everything was rubbish”.
            “You can’t go in there,” says an officious looking haircut, as atheist tax scam walks past a branch of a well-known high street bank of thieving scum parasites. Atheist tax scam is worried that the officious looking haircut is in cahoots with his arch nemesis, and walks in the opposite direction mumbling something about reading his compass a bit wrong because it was being affected by the shift in the Earth’s magnetic polarity, all of which would have been true, but only if.
            Now at a loose end, atheist tax scam pockets the silver linings which he has amassed; there are three, which is one more than the average. He walks into a pub, “The Fiddler’s Inn”, which is run by Benedictine monks, and exchanges the silver linings for everlasting redemption which, in this case, comes in the form of seven Green Shield Stamp Vouchers for a pop-up toaster. “Remember to take it with you when you get to Heaven, where it will be exchanged for a pair of white wings, a golden harp and a cloud,” says the Landlord and Chief Thurifer, whose legs seem to be made of frankincense, but only in a certain light. Atheist tax scam looks at the Green Shield pop-up toaster vouchers; he wonders whether he really will be able to exchange them for a pair of white wings, a golden harp and a cloud when he gets to Heaven, then realizes that you can always trust a monk, especially one with a sincere voice, an honest smile and fiddly hands.
            Walking across the road to catch the 197 bus to Peru, atheist tax scam is knocked down by a fieldful of sheep travelling at 80 miles per second; it is travelling so fast that no-one sees it, and the corporeal existence of atheist tax scam comes to an instant halt as his body is vaporized by the impact with his arch nemesis.

Atheist tax scam cannot redeem his Green Shield pop-up toaster vouchers for a pair of white wings, a golden harp or a cloud. Death is like that.

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