The problem with humanity
(oh, here we go!)
is that we’re so fucking hot-headed
(you see what I mean?).
Wouldn’t it be better if we attempted to live our lives
peaceably, calmly,
instead of doing what we do best,
all of the time:
putting other people under the microscope,
so that we can say, gleefully,
‘Look! A fault! For shame!
Hang on a sec,
let me just magnify it so you can see…’
The next time you see someone with a peashooter,
remember the forty-seven peashooters
which you keep hidden about your person,
at all times.
The next time you see someone aim a peashooter,
remember what happened
when you fired that rocket-launcher
from your attic.
The next time,
and the time after that,
and the time after that,
and the time after that.
The opposite of infinite regress:
ad infinitum.
What’s that you say?
Sort my own shit out?
Yeah, I was totally talking to myself
(didn’t realise you were listening).
You know what they say about bloody eavesdroppers?
Now,
what did I just say?
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