Monday 9 September 2019

Be Careful with Your Demands


Punch Your Local Nazi,
the poorly, homemade sign proclaimed,
with a swastika drawn beneath it,
as per Hitler’s design.

‘Excuse me, my smug young man,’
I said to the creature holding said sign,
‘but was this fine specimen
of six-year-old artwork

created by your fair but freckled hand?’
‘Erm…’ he replied.
‘As I thought; a dumbing down in required.
Did you make this sign?’ I asked.

‘Oh, this? Yes,’ he replied.
And I smashed him in the teeth
with my smashing-teeth fist,
all knuckly and smashy-teethy.

As he was incapable of speaking,
I answered his unasked question.
‘Because only Nazis draw swastikas
to Hitler’s exact design.

Now, do something more useful
with your life,
and the let the grown-ups get on with
ruining the world.’

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