Monday, 2 September 2013


People who hate subtlety and wit will be familiar with the “Police Academy” series of films from the 80s. The premise for the original film was that, as part of a recruitment drive, or possibly a modernization process, the Police Force of an American City would do away with barriers which had hitherto prevented certain people from being police officers (certain people being previously too small, weird, unassertive, drug-addled, etc.). Hence, a class of useless misfits caused havoc for 90 minutes. Oh, how we yawned.
   The BBC stole half the title for their festival of dullards, “Fame Academy”.
   I think that “Fame Academy” should be relaunched, but taking the spirit of the American film franchise as their guiding principle, i.e. people who previously could not be famous due to lack of talent, beauty, intellect, etc., vie with similarly talentless, ugly, stupid people to become famous.
    The winner gets to be the next Manchester United manager.

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