“All the Democrats needed to do was find a warm human body to beat Trump. Maybe not even that; a wardrobe or perhaps a ham sandwich could have won the race. It’s as though they’ve scoured the country in order to find the only person who might be able to lose this election.”
- Guardian Comment is Free contributor
The President need be no more
Than Cupboard Space or Parquet Floor,
Or Garden Gate or Sparkly Wig,
Or Tutu-Wearing Dancing Pig.
The President this year could be
A Biscuit Dunked in Builder’s Tea,
A Doorstep Sandwich Filled with Ham,
A Wardrobe or the Hoover Dam.
They’ve had a Bush, they’ve had a Carter,
They could have picked a Burning Martyr,
A Smoking Gun, or Frying Pan,
To beat the Odd-haired Orange Man.
Instead they chose a Coughing Fit,
A Can of Worms, a Lying Twit,
To do their bidding on the stump –
And in so doing, gave us Trump.