Name of Boat (a sketch all at sea)

Inside the offices of the Somewhere-on-Sea Boat and Yacht Owners’ Club

An employee (filling in form): Name of boat?

Boat/Yacht owner: Name of Boat.

A: Yes, that’s right. (pause) Name of boat.

B: Name of Boat.

A: Yes, the name of your boat.

(there is a pause)

B: Name of Boat.

A: No, look. Tell. Me. The. Name. Of. Your. Boat.

B: Name. of. Boat.

A: My God. Look. What... is... the... name... of... your... boat...?

B: The... name... of... my... boat... is... Name... of... Boat...

A: Name of Boat?

B: Name of Boat.

A: Name of Boat?

B: Name of Boat.

A: Name of Boat?! What kind of name is ‘Name of Boat’ for a boat? (pause while writes down Name of Boat in Name of Boat space). Right. (pause) And, Name of Yacht.

B: Name of Yacht?

A: Name of Yacht! The name of your yacht is Name of Yacht?!

B: No, that would be ridiculous. Of course the name of my yacht isn’t Name of Yacht. I was only seeking confirmation, as your utterance was a statement and not a question. Name of Yacht? I said, to which you might have replied, ‘Yes, that’s right; what’s the name of your Yacht? instead of shouting at me in a manner most unnecessary. (pause) No, the name of my yacht is The Name is This Yacht is the Name of That Yacht.

A: What?!!

B: No, yacht. Y-A-C...

A: Yes, I can spell yacht. Just for clarification, though: the name of your yacht is The Name of This Yacht is the Name of That Yacht?

B: Yes. The Name of my yacht is The Name of This Yacht is the Name of That Yacht.

A: (furiously scribbling). Now, registration is pretty simple, I just need to have your signature. Mr...?

B: Name of Man.