Monday, 22 September 2014

Step Forward Gods of the Heavy

‘Rock journalism is written by people who can’t write for people who can’t read’ 
                                                                                           – Sir Frank of Zappa

Just what is it about the Midlands and hard rockers?

Is it something in the air?

Is it something in the water?

Is it something in the air and in the water?

Maybe it’s the accents?

Until science shines its all-seeing light on the matter, we’ll never know for sure, but in the meantime, there can be no denying that the Midlands is the birthplace of the highest form of human artistic achievement outside of the Sistine Chapel.

I refer, of course, to Heavy Metal.

All that is needed to prove this bold statement is to name check a handful of bands who have so enriched the metallic life our nation.

They’re all from around here.

Here goes:

Black Sabbath, and if that’s not enough evidence for you then there’s…

Judas Priest, and if you need further proof then how about…

Diamond Head? and if you haven’t heard of them…

there’s always Slade, who were so important that they even named an art school after them three-hundred miles away in London, of all places.

If all of that that wasn’t enough to convince you, then the coup the grace, the clincher, the absolute final word on the matter belongs to a Midlands band that has had massive commercial success everywhere in the world.

The band that stands at the vibrating and vibrant heart in the pantheon of all things authentically leather-clad, rifftastic and screechworthy; the very apotheosis of the heavy musical experience.

I refer, of course, to Duran Duran.

Wild Boys! You betcha.

Or, as their best-selling biography, ‘Make-Up is for Boys’, should have been called, ‘The Toughest Band the Midlands Ever Produced’.

I mean, have you seen the video? Turn this one up to 11, eh, boys?

Who’s with me?

Long Live Synthesizers!

By Len Zebbelim

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